Wow…10 days into April and it’s still barely above freezing point in the ‘Peg.  This is making my friend’s invite to Fiji even more enticing.

But I digress–this isn’t a post about the current weather in Winnipeg or my potential vacation plans–it is, according to the list, about my first love and first kiss.

Gah.  I’m so not in the mood to do this right now–I have two three hour staff meetings today and talking about the shambles of my love life is not going to make this more fun.  so I will speak to them in brief and then finish it off with a bit of a twist–my first bad kiss. lol.

Alrighty.  First kiss happened in Grade 2–two boys in my class started chasing me around the class room during indoor lunch (it was freezing out) and they managed to catch me, pin me down and one of them stuck his tongue in my mouth.  Fortunately I was able to break away before the other one could do the same.  Gag.

My first proper kiss happened when I was about 17.  It was nothing to write home about, nor was it romantic.  Just sorta happened.

My first love–gah.  It ended up being someone whom I befriended on a chat room on the early days of the internet in like 1994…I know–sounds ridiculous….but it didn’t become anything until about 12 years after we met online, when we met face to face at an airport while I was en route to Australia for my graduation gift to myself after grad school.  No shenanigans happened then, but there was an out of this world spark.  We ended up meeting up again about 5 months later in his city.  This is when I fell hard and fast.  Little did I know that he apparently was dealing with a lot of family crap that he didn’t want to tell me about and thus ruin my good time.  I told him how I felt and he lied (I found out later) and said he didn’t feel the same.  It broke my heart.

Then about 2-3 years later he emails me on Facebook, apologizes and asks to call me.  I say fine…give him my number and a time to call and he says that he hasn’t been able to stop thinking of me since our last phone call where he blew me off, apologized for lying, etc and he wants me and to spend his life with me.  Needless to say, this didn’t work and my heart was broken again. This time, however, I ended it because it just wasn’t working (we weren’t able to see each other because the economy tanked and he lost his job and I worked in a job at the time where I wasn’t allowed to leave) and it was making me feel like shit.  It’s unfortunate though as he is someone I really cared about and was someone who got me in ways at which I don’t even fully comprehend.

Bah….so yeah…there’s that whole shebang–an online friendship which morphed into a few fleeting attempts at long distance relationship that lasted 15 years.  *sigh*  What’s even crazier is that a little more than a year after we parted ways, he had married someone.  So…yeah…yay Love. 😐

Onto a more entertaining note, I am finishing this post with my worst kiss ever.  Ready? lol.  This kiss happened on my second match from E-harmony.  Seemed like a normal enough guy.  We met up for drinks in a lounge in downtown Winnipeg.  I had come straight from a group dinner with friends from out-of-town so I was really dressed up and was rocking my new red lipstick from MAC called Brave Red–little did that lipstick know that it was going into battle.

As I was saying goodbye, he gave me a hug and went in for the unexpected kill and started kissing me.  I didn’t think it was possible to inhale somebody’s face, but this guy made me a believer.  Red lipstick was smeared all over him and all over me (which was impossible to rub off–damn Brave Red)–and it was so unpleasantly intense that I even had trouble trying to break free.  And when he broke off, he bit me on the lip.  I’m sure he thought it was playful, but I ended up with a lightly bruised and swollen lip.  When I asked what that was about, he said, well, you said you liked “True Blood” so I thought you’d be kinky like that.

Needless to say, I never saw him again.  I’m amazed I didn’t punch him in that moment.  Such crazy people.

And on that note–staff meeting day is about to start.

Loves ya!